Aug 17, 2011 07:04
NOOB WARS
Noob WARS
A play by a Noob
Cast
Noobolo aka Oloboon: A Bolo Noobawan, outspoken in his beliefs.
Noob13579: A Bolo Noobawan, who loves tazering the balls of Oloboon at any opportunity.
EryNooB: A thin skinned Bolo Noobawan. A chameleon in disguise.
Nooba: An 800 year old green midget
Obi-wan-Ke-noob-i: A Noob Master, powerful in the ways of Noob
Darth Noober: An evil Noob master
Noob Solo: ChewNooba’s best (source of) bud, a lone Noober
ChewNooba: The greatest roar of all noobs, but can’t talk
Princess Nooba: Ready to pose scantily-clad in a Bikini for one line of the good stuff
ACT I
Obi-wan-Ke-noob-i: “Use the noob Oloboon, let it flow”
Oloboon: “Shut your cake hole old man!”
Nooba: “Noob or noob not, there is no try”
Oloboon: “Midget, you so wrinkled, you been sitting in a bath for about 58 years”
Noob Solo: “I’ve got a bad noob about this”
ChewNooba: <roar>
ACT II
Noob13579: “I am greater than you in the power of noob Oloboon”
Oloboon: “1x1”
Oloboon: “NooBot map Jonny”
<17 seconds later>
Noob13579: “gg”
Oloboon: “gg, best of 3, let’s small ball this one”
Oloboon: “NooBot map smallball”
Oloboon: “NooBot map smallball”
Oloboon: “NooBot map smallball”
Oloboon: “NooBot map smallball”
……
<time passes>
Oloboon: “ok best of 27…..”
ACT III
EryNooBc2: “Hi, I am a Noob player, looking to learn about the powers of Noob”
Noob13579: “You are EryNooB”
EryNooBc2: “Ummmm, I played Mac Bolo”
Noob13579: “Even your IP says you are EryNooB”
EryNooBc2: “My name is EryNooBc2, not EryNooB”
Noob13579: “The power of the Noob tells me I am correct”
ACT IV
Darth Noober: “I am the greatest Noober ever! I can beat all noobs”
Noob13579: “Not ALL of us”
Darth Noober: “Yes, ALL of you, at the same time”
Oloboon: “NooBot map Dissonance”
NooBot: “Mapping Noob Dissonance”
EryNooB: “Let’s do this”
Noob13579: “EryNoob you’re back!”
EryNooB: “Oh, yeah, right, let’s just forget about that.”
<Inside the battle>
EryNooB: “Stay on Target”
EryNooB: “Stay on Target”
EryNooB: “Stay on Target”
<The sound of a Pill being fixed, a large explosion, dust settles>
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from EryNooB >
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from EryNooB >
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from EryNooB >
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from EryNooB >
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from EryNooB >
Oloboon: “Damn, I was aiming at the block, not the dead Pill”
<later>
Noob13579: “Fix, no lgm”
<EryNooBc2 has lost his builder>
<Oloboon has lost his builder>
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from Noob13579>
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from Noob13579>
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from Noob13579>
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from Noob13579>
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from Noob13579>
EryNooB: “!@#$%^&*()”
<later>
Oloboon: “East”
Oloboon: “I mean West”
Oloboon: “East”
Oloboon: “North East”
Oloboon: “North north East”
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from Oloboon >
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from Oloboon >
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from Oloboon >
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from Oloboon >
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from Oloboon >
Oloboon: “Sheeyat”
ACT V
Obi-wan-Ke-noob-i: “Remember Oloboon, use the Noob”
Oloboon: <Where did that damn voice come from, maybe I should listen>
Oloboon: “Triple this! Noobs Unite!”
<Oloboon has stolen pillbox from Darth Noober>
Darth Noober: “Aarrgghhhhh!”
Noob Solo: “You’re all clear BoonDik, now let’s blow this sucker and go home”
Oloboon: “BoonDik, wtf is he talking about! Wait a sec….K….I...D….…………...I don’t get it!”
Noob13579: “Where did he come from?”
Noob Solo: “You stupid noobs forgot to lock, I was sitting in the trees, didn’t you even notice that I joined”
EryNooB: “I don’t read the writing at the bottom, it scrolls just a little too fast for me to give a shit, just as I don’t keep an eye on the bases, pills or even Pill View”
Oloboon: “What writing?”
Noob13579: “I use that for inflammatory comments directed at Oloboon and ally calls only”
Noob Solo: “Doh!”
ChewNooba: <roar>
ACT VI
Oloboon: “Yeehaa, gg”
EryNooB: “Yay, I was just pretending to be EryNooBc2”
Noob13579: “We won! My confidence is restored”
<IRC hugging between Noobs, internet sex comes later thanks to Noob13579: “I slowly reach into your pants.” and Princess Nooba: “let’s snort some lines and then I’ll get this bikini off”>
Darth Noober: “You beat me noobs, but you have much to learn about NooBolo!”
Oloboon: “I won’t gloat, but….you suck Darth!”
Oloboon: “Let all noobs stick together, no more fighting, only harmony”
Noob13579: “Where is that dayum tazer? .. but OK”
EryNooB: “OK”
<Emotionally uplifting music plays as the three noobs receive their medals>
THE END
All characters appearing in this work, even Oloboon who is obviously Diabolo, are fictitious. Any resemblance to real Noobs, living or dead, is purely coincidental.
A play by a Noob
Cast
Noobolo aka Oloboon: A Bolo Noobawan, outspoken in his beliefs.
Noob13579: A Bolo Noobawan, who loves tazering the balls of Oloboon at any opportunity.
EryNooB: A thin skinned Bolo Noobawan. A chameleon in disguise.
Nooba: An 800 year old green midget
Obi-wan-Ke-noob-i: A Noob Master, powerful in the ways of Noob
Darth Noober: An evil Noob master
Noob Solo: ChewNooba’s best (source of) bud, a lone Noober
ChewNooba: The greatest roar of all noobs, but can’t talk
Princess Nooba: Ready to pose scantily-clad in a Bikini for one line of the good stuff
ACT I
Obi-wan-Ke-noob-i: “Use the noob Oloboon, let it flow”
Oloboon: “Shut your cake hole old man!”
Nooba: “Noob or noob not, there is no try”
Oloboon: “Midget, you so wrinkled, you been sitting in a bath for about 58 years”
Noob Solo: “I’ve got a bad noob about this”
ChewNooba: <roar>
ACT II
Noob13579: “I am greater than you in the power of noob Oloboon”
Oloboon: “1x1”
Oloboon: “NooBot map Jonny”
<17 seconds later>
Noob13579: “gg”
Oloboon: “gg, best of 3, let’s small ball this one”
Oloboon: “NooBot map smallball”
Oloboon: “NooBot map smallball”
Oloboon: “NooBot map smallball”
Oloboon: “NooBot map smallball”
……
<time passes>
Oloboon: “ok best of 27…..”
ACT III
EryNooBc2: “Hi, I am a Noob player, looking to learn about the powers of Noob”
Noob13579: “You are EryNooB”
EryNooBc2: “Ummmm, I played Mac Bolo”
Noob13579: “Even your IP says you are EryNooB”
EryNooBc2: “My name is EryNooBc2, not EryNooB”
Noob13579: “The power of the Noob tells me I am correct”
ACT IV
Darth Noober: “I am the greatest Noober ever! I can beat all noobs”
Noob13579: “Not ALL of us”
Darth Noober: “Yes, ALL of you, at the same time”
Oloboon: “NooBot map Dissonance”
NooBot: “Mapping Noob Dissonance”
EryNooB: “Let’s do this”
Noob13579: “EryNoob you’re back!”
EryNooB: “Oh, yeah, right, let’s just forget about that.”
<Inside the battle>
EryNooB: “Stay on Target”
EryNooB: “Stay on Target”
EryNooB: “Stay on Target”
<The sound of a Pill being fixed, a large explosion, dust settles>
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from EryNooB >
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from EryNooB >
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from EryNooB >
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from EryNooB >
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from EryNooB >
Oloboon: “Damn, I was aiming at the block, not the dead Pill”
<later>
Noob13579: “Fix, no lgm”
<EryNooBc2 has lost his builder>
<Oloboon has lost his builder>
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from Noob13579>
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from Noob13579>
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from Noob13579>
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from Noob13579>
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from Noob13579>
EryNooB: “!@#$%^&*()”
<later>
Oloboon: “East”
Oloboon: “I mean West”
Oloboon: “East”
Oloboon: “North East”
Oloboon: “North north East”
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from Oloboon >
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from Oloboon >
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from Oloboon >
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from Oloboon >
< Darth Noober has stolen pillbox from Oloboon >
Oloboon: “Sheeyat”
ACT V
Obi-wan-Ke-noob-i: “Remember Oloboon, use the Noob”
Oloboon: <Where did that damn voice come from, maybe I should listen>
Oloboon: “Triple this! Noobs Unite!”
<Oloboon has stolen pillbox from Darth Noober>
Darth Noober: “Aarrgghhhhh!”
Noob Solo: “You’re all clear BoonDik, now let’s blow this sucker and go home”
Oloboon: “BoonDik, wtf is he talking about! Wait a sec….K….I...D….…………...I don’t get it!”
Noob13579: “Where did he come from?”
Noob Solo: “You stupid noobs forgot to lock, I was sitting in the trees, didn’t you even notice that I joined”
EryNooB: “I don’t read the writing at the bottom, it scrolls just a little too fast for me to give a shit, just as I don’t keep an eye on the bases, pills or even Pill View”
Oloboon: “What writing?”
Noob13579: “I use that for inflammatory comments directed at Oloboon and ally calls only”
Noob Solo: “Doh!”
ChewNooba: <roar>
ACT VI
Oloboon: “Yeehaa, gg”
EryNooB: “Yay, I was just pretending to be EryNooBc2”
Noob13579: “We won! My confidence is restored”
<IRC hugging between Noobs, internet sex comes later thanks to Noob13579: “I slowly reach into your pants.” and Princess Nooba: “let’s snort some lines and then I’ll get this bikini off”>
Darth Noober: “You beat me noobs, but you have much to learn about NooBolo!”
Oloboon: “I won’t gloat, but….you suck Darth!”
Oloboon: “Let all noobs stick together, no more fighting, only harmony”
Noob13579: “Where is that dayum tazer? .. but OK”
EryNooB: “OK”
<Emotionally uplifting music plays as the three noobs receive their medals>
THE END
All characters appearing in this work, even Oloboon who is obviously Diabolo, are fictitious. Any resemblance to real Noobs, living or dead, is purely coincidental.